Paranormal Jokes thread..post yours here

A paranormal researcher was giving a talk in the Village town hall and asks out of interest, Does any one think they seen a ghost? ….about 9 hands went up. Ok then I wonder has anyone ever spoken to a ghost? …about 5 hands go up .Ok then I wonder has anyone made love to a ghost? 1 hand goes up. What? you have made love to a ghost? asks the researcher….. the reply – sorry, I thought you said Goat.

A paranormal researcher was giving a talk in the Village town hall and asks out of interest, Does any one think they seen a ghost? ….about 9 hands went up. Ok then I wonder has anyone ever spoken to a ghost? …about 5 hands go up .Ok then I wonder has anyone made love to a ghost? 1 hand goes up. What? you have made love to a ghost? asks the researcher….. the reply – sorry, I thought you said Goat.

hahahahaha,to funny

A paranormal researcher was giving a talk in the Village town hall and asks out of interest, Does any one think they seen a ghost? ….about 9 hands went up. Ok then I wonder has anyone ever spoken to a ghost? …about 5 hands go up .Ok then I wonder has anyone made love to a ghost? 1 hand goes up. What? you have made love to a ghost? asks the researcher….. the reply – sorry, I thought you said Goat.

This cracked me up!!!!!! Now here's my attempt...

What do you get when you cross Bambi with a ghost?
Bamboo 😁

Browsing Old Cemeteries
Some fascinating things on old tombstones!

Harry Edsel Smith of Albany, New York :

Born 1903--Died 1942.
Looked up the elevator shaft to see if the
car was on the way down. It was.

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In a Thurmont, Maryland , cemetery:

Here lies an Atheist, all dressed up and no
place to go.

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On the grave of Ezekial Aikle in
East Dalhousie Cemetery , Nova Scotia :

Here lies Ezekial Aikle, Age 102. Only The
Good Die Young.

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In a London , England cemetery:

Here lies Ann Mann, Who lived an old maid
but died an old Mann. Dec. 8, 1767

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In a Ribbesford, England , cemetery:

Anna Wallace
The children of Israel wanted bread, And
the Lord sent them manna. Clark Wallace
wanted a wife, And the Devil sent him Anna.

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In a Ruidoso, New Mexico , cemetery:

Here lies Johnny Yeast... Pardon me
for not rising.

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In a Uniontown, Pennsylvania , cemetery:

Here lies the body of Jonathan Blake.
Stepped on the gas instead of the brake.

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In a Silver City, Nevada, cemetery:

Here lays The Kid.
We planted him raw.
He was quick on the trigger
But slow on the draw.

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A lawyer's epitaph in England :

Sir John Strange.
Here lies an honest lawyer,
and that is Strange.

============ ========= ========= ===

John Penny's epitaph in the Wimborne,
England , cemetery:

Reader, if cash thou art in want of any,
Dig 6 feet deep and thou wilt find a Penny.

============ ========= ========= ====

In a cemetery in Hartscombe , England :

On the 22nd of June, Jonathan Fiddle went
out of tune.

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Anna Hopewell's grave in Enosburg Falls ,
Vermont :

Here lies the body of our Anna,
Done to death by a banana.
It wasn't the fruit that laid her low,
But the skin of the thing that made her go.

============ ========= ========= ====

On a grave from the 1880s in Nantucket ,
Massachusetts :

Under the sod and under the trees,
Lies the body of Jonathan Pease.
He is not here, there's only the pod.
Pease shelled out and went to God.

============ ========= ========= ====

In a cemetery in England :

Remember man, as you walk by,
As you are now, so once was I
As I am now, so shall you be.
Remember this and follow me.

To which someone replied by writing
on the tombstone:

To follow you I'll not consent .
Until I know which way you went.

Those are great Delleena! I'm working on one for me 😁
Hows this....

I am now gone
but do not cry
just log on
to livescifi!
See you there!!!! 😆

Chas took my joke 😁

But I have a back up 😁

If you have a spirit just give us a call.
We'll pack up our car and even bring our doll.
When the day turns to night thats when we shine.
We are the paranormal group www.livescifi.
The fans are the hunters. They are the best.
They help us find the paranormal without any rest.
We have all the gadgets. We have toys.
Surching for the paranormal and helping people bring us lots of joy.
So when you had it up to here and you think you have a ghost.
Just give us a call , and we'll turn that little bastard into toast.

A paranormal researcher was giving a talk in the Village town hall and asks out of interest, Does any one think they seen a ghost? ….about 9 hands went up. Ok then I wonder has anyone ever spoken to a ghost? …about 5 hands go up .Ok then I wonder has anyone made love to a ghost? 1 hand goes up. What? you have made love to a ghost? asks the researcher….. the reply – sorry, I thought you said Goat.

lol, that is just awful, and yet I can't stop laughing.

Cheesy ghost joke first:
Why are cemeteries surrounded by gates?
.. cause people are just dying to get in.

And cause the tombstone ones were so great here are more:

I was somebody. Who, is no business Of yours.
-- Vermont

Here lies Lester Moore; Four slugs from a .44; No Les No More.
-- Tombstone Arizona

John Brown is filling his last cavity.
-- Dentist's Tombstone

I told you that I was sick!
-- Georgia Cemetary, USA

"I put my wife beneath this stone
For her repose and for my own."

"Owen Moore, gone away, owin' more than he could pay."

"Gone underground for good."

HERE LIES
CUJO
GOOD DOG

husband/wife. the husband buys the wife a headstone saying "cold as usual". she buys one back "stiff at last"

Here lies Oakford Grain
Saw a light at the end of the tunnel
It was a train

Here lies Seymore Butts
Buried face down

HERE LIES
my wife,
I bid her goodbye.
She rests in peace
and now so do I.

On an attorney’s tombstone:
Goembel
John E.
1867-1946
“The defense restsâ€